Ok. I'm quite sure my menses would be coming soon. Reason being I'm easily provoked these days. But hey, to guys out there, it definitely ain't becos of the hormones changing that leads me to think what I think, so better be clear before u assumed it was AGAIN!
Have been quite upset with my frens' responses to what I have said. It was more of me having 'sympathy' for them... well, no, it's more of "CAN'T YOU GET IT! OPEN UP YOUR DAMN MIND TO ACCEPT THINGS! You closed up ppl!"
DISCLAIMER: As what I've mentioned years ago in my "red alert" corner (right side) tt what I typed here may hurt the ppl around me but it will be the fact of what I think. So here's my blog and don't u need to stop me. As for a fact, if you're concerned about me as an individual, you'll try to understand why I think so of stuffs.
Oh, in fact, what I'm gonna write here is what I've said it to the person earlier so nothing like backstabbing happens.
First incident.
I told my bestie about mom teaching me one stuff on how to balance with life if I, as a graduate, marrying a blue-collar worker. Mom said she saw from TV tt a woman had a similar situation, so what she does was to avoid networking meetings - such as a 10th yr anniversary school thingy where everyone there is looking forward to see how each classmates' lives are like now, more specifically it was a place to compare career status, social status and money wealth display. (Note: I meant display of wealth, not in real terms.)So what tt woman does is that she tries to avoid going to such places, not because she was ashamed of who she married but it was to not let her husband felt pressurized for nothing. Then what, go home and argue? She rather avoid such places and have the warmth of her happy family on a Saturday evening.
However, if she can't avoid it, like going work conferences(encouraged to bring along family), she would have no choice but to go. Then again she would choose not to bring her husband for the same reason. Without saying, causal outings like with a closer group of friends(even when all her friends r graduates with high income earnings), she would then bring her husband to such gatherings as it would be a gathering of the hearts, not money display.
So to this woman, it is all about having a happy family. Reflecting back to me, I tot this story was very clever of the woman, knowing to prioritizes the peace and happiness of the family over her flaunt of wealth and status. Humans should by right be like this to really enjoy the so called 'life'. So I tot, yeah tt would be a learning point for me, such that a woman must be clever and flexible enough to know how to handle the heart of her hubby as well as the views from the society. Like I've always tot that a woman needs to be 'manipulative' when working about the hearts of each member in her nucleus family, to attain peacefulness and happiness within.
Guess what my bestie said after she hear the story? She said "If so, how long could you kept him hidden?" I was like wtf?! Can't u get it! It is ppl like you that do not understand happiness from within prioritizing over material security. Not bringing my partner to such superficial social settings is NOT FOR THE SAKE OF HIDING HIM, it is for the sake of wanting a blissful family, for god sake! If I felt ashamed and wanted to "hide" him, I wouldn't in the first place to take on such a guy, hello? I'm not ashamed of my guy, he would be having a stable and respectable job. He still earns a living and feeds me, babe. By doing so is to not let my hubby gets pressurized and be unhappy, ending in a broken marriage.
This is the response I get from a 17 yrs of friendship, from my bestie? I'm thinking tt it's still a long way to go for her to really understand what I like to have in my life and what I really treasure in life. Fyi, I love my bf very much as he is great for me. To be fair to me, afterall, I have been telling her stuffs of how I feel loved, about though it may be hard at times but we're so good when the material factors doesn't come into place. Hence the more I would be expecting her to understand (well, a lot more than any other social friends) that it is great for me to be with him, just tt as a woman myself, I need to be able to be more flexible about how I go about doing things that would give me and him a blissful marriage.
Second incident.
Xiaxue's blog. Get the story from here http://xiaxue.blogspot.com/. Well, summarizing, it is about Temasek Review, quoted as "A review of Singapore's current affairs from an unique, interesting and sexy perspective", where I find it to be an online platform known for their bias-ness against S'pore ruling political party and their lamenting for S'poreans. This time due to the bi-election issue, they put up XiaXue and friends' pictures from one yr ago on fb and says "captions please". Random people starts to scold them and it was worsen into calling them prostitutes, which they aren't. Fyi, this bi-election, she hasn't spoken a word about it so I don't see the reason why she was being attacked for nothing. Hence on her blog, she refuted back to those ppl who scolded her and even went to the extend of posting their pictures(even with family and friends) and saying how sore they are.First of first, I am a supporter of XiaXue's tots where I find her true to her words and speaking up for what she is, which I think it is of nothing wrong. However, I am not supportive of the way or style that she speaks or blogs about it, as at times it could sound really superficial and brainless. Then again, no one is perfect right?
So as I read her post " The Faces of Haters" I tot it was very good of her to use her linguistic abilities as well as her reputation to "suan" back those mindless, closed up and idiot-proof ppl. In my view, it is always ppl who hate her to the core who are the arrogant, brainless ones. Why? Because she is so clever to leverage on her time and effort to do blogging like a job, like a self-employed. With almost a decade of doing so, she gained popularity that enable her to reap the benefits of it (also termed as e-compunding according to the book, Parables of the Pipeline, pg 79 to 92 out of the 116). It is such that she gains popularity and earns through advertisement slots placed on her blog or commenting about a product/service. Not only so, her ROM has proven that she was a person worth companies sponsoring. (Her video's here). Can anyone her age, not being a celebrity, esp. in Singapore having such benefits? No! Yet, most of her haters felt tt she never gotten herself a worklife, never will understand the toughness of life. Come on, so what she didn't? She has made it happy in her life no matter how many haters, she gets to enjoy the supreme stuffs sponsored, and still she managed to earn a living. So what she didn't slog like the rest did? Now, who's the stupid ones slogging to death and complaining that she didn't went through the toughness of life?
Bringing back to topic, I had a fren, nicknamed Papergoat, who is one of her haters. I wanted him to look at that hot issue post so as to ensure he wasn't as lowly as those ppl who criticized her in a way like calling her prostitutes. He didn't wanna read it and my msg to him went like this:
"Firstly, it isn't hot (issue) within the pap community, it was on news, on paper. Secondly, she's not stupid. She has an IQ that's about 150 which is more than the average. Thirdly i know you dislike her, but still ask u to go read it so that u, my friend, would not be as stupid as the others to be as shallow as them. So go read in order to be not as close up and arrogant as the others."
He replied, "Eh tts only personal opinion before reading leh. Y get so offensive. Zzz"
Lyrics focus -
A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singing
Funny, when you're dead how people start listening
"U know what? I'm really starting to think if i should sound more assertive to get my friends and family to listen for what i have to say. Cos i noticed only at times i being so, then will i get ppl's attention . If not, it makes me seems like a pushover. i know my previous msg sure sounds offended, but it's not. I'm just trying to get my point across, like i've mentioned, i wouldn't want my friend, u, to become one of the lowly idiots she mentioned in her Blog. And not only that, personal opinion - keep an open mind."
That leads me to think, why r ppl around me so closed up? Am I also that closed up in my tots tt's why the ppl around me are? Like the saying "Birds of the same feathers flock together." I tot I'm quite liberal in my thinking~
Third incident
Like another gal fren (M) who went angry on her friend(Z) signing up for a direct-selling company, Amway. M felt angry about Z wanted to sell her stuffs without telling her it was from that company. I tot maybe Z shld have told M, but on the other hand, it is a business technique not to tell since that company's reputation kind of associate with bad rumors - similarly to Xiaxue's name. Furthermore, I wonder if Z was right to not tell M initially about it since M would have reacted this way to it.I mean my frens felt negatively towards MLM companies(where Amway is in fact not considered as one to be strict on it), which is legal. The Pyramid structure is the illegal one and ppl kept on confusing them together and hate such systems, which I don't get it personally. Afterall, these systems r great systems in the business world to earn residual income and in a legal way. It doesn't hurt ppl nor do such systems goes against ethics. Moreover, such systems are in fact active in a lot of conglomerates but in such organisations they think it is ok, but in obvious MLM companies they think it's bullshit.(well, i can't name them for sure as I do not wanna get into courts disputes.) But I don't get it! The obvious ones they think it is bad, the unobvious ones they think it's ok. Like what the fish?!
To conclude, I'm just kind of upset/fed-up with ppl not opening their mind to new ideas, esp. they making a firm opinion about something after they gain little knowledge on it. I wouldn't dare to brag that I know a lot, but I won't deny that I am open to different perspectives, take-in and rethink.
So sometimes it just kind of saddens me when my closest friends are hugely defensive on topics they really know little of, and the worse is that, they didn't wanna know more to prove if their stand was even correct or not. No wonder adults(including Robert Kiyosaki) always asked to "MIND MY OWN BUSINNESS" literately, to only take care of my own revenue, my own happiness and not care about others. It's a tough call, since I'm known since young for being a 'kay-po' which I am in concern for others while others may see me as interfering their lives.
i tell u something. before u asked mi to read the blog, i actually read through the thing way up in genting, only half cuz the bottom is her shaming those who commented on her photos. totally pointless.
ReplyDeletethat aside, i give u some of my thoughts, not on the blog, but general stuff.
yes, i do agree that we have to maintain an open mind to new issues which are happening. we should not assume things are in such a way, before things actually occure. like what the ang moh always like to say, "dun count ur chicks before they hatch". take ferrari crash as an example, one PRC cause accident dun mean all PRC drives this way.
however, one should have their own stand on issues. without a stand, life will not have a direction. take for example. i can be open to the idea of the presense of christianity, but my stand is to reject being a converted into one of them. this is important because, religion aside, ur stand gives u beliefs and things to fight/work for (peaceful or not). the same goes for politician, managers etc etc, down to an employee in an organisation.
so therefore, my beliefs about her blog/presense has just turned mi into one of her haters. but i've still read the blog in genting. if u dun belief, what makes u think i have the impression that this topic is "popular within PAP community"? and i reply so fast "without ever reading it"? only by reading it before hand had i been able to understand what u were refering to on her blog.
so, my beliefs had given mi the perspective on the contents of the blog entry. but hey, these opinions are kept to myself until someone asked for it. those arses who commented on her photos are idiots i agree. but opinions are opinions, no one can change. (want to know how to manage these opinions, read my course work :D )
so, regarding ur bestie making comments like "hidding him forever", its the opinion thingy playing tricks again. these opinions are formed by mostly social norms, and portrayal on TV shows. unless u can do something bout these, opinions are hard to change.
maybe its not ur frens who are being too "closed-up" by ur definition, but perhaps its just that they form their opinions and beliefs at much faster speed. sitting on the ledge being undecisive is not a good thing. sometimes it can be like sitting on a bomb (dunno if u get what i mean here).
finished with life lesson. the above is meant not to argue with u.
ReplyDeletethis is. cuz u make mi slightly angry with ur writings. >:( and this gives u a sneak peek into my brain, and to defend papergoat
back to the blog. u mentioned that the blog caused quite a stir and was published on the newspaper. sorry i not in sg i dunno. but since u said tt (with my beliefs and opinion), that is even more not worth reading (again. but got shot from u instead for rejecting the idea). however, as mentioned in the opening, i read it even up in genting (see? i so concern bout sg happenings). explain below
1) blogs generally contains bias contents. unless its blogs like gundamguy.blogspot.com , i think no need read unless u interested in the person la~ (btw, i visit here cus i knew u gonna write something bout papergoat >:( )
2) the entry is about the negative effects of her support towards PAP
3) SPH is, in my opinion, a state bias media. headlines on paper always gives wrong impression on those who oppose govt.and what they report is also rather selective.
4) SPH chose to publish the entry during the by-election period, close to cooling off day some more
5) the entry kinda potray her haters as anti-PAP (though i dun like PAP too). therefore at the point of time, anti-PAP = WP supporters
summing my 5 brief points, its easy to see y i came to such negative attitude towards the entry.
the above 5 points is also the main reason seeking alternative source of news is so important. therefore i read BBC (all hail nageb). i shared with an uncle i met onboard the bus back to sg from genting bout the mainstream media (msm), its easy as a conclusion that our msm is indeed bias. the only reason i still read our newspaper is for the local news which cannot be bias towards anyone. (seems like recently they turn bias towards foreigners also, to check it out soon)
so i think in fact, i may actually be more open minded that you are (preference on physical issues aside) for u dun wanna read my coursework which provides the most open-minded view :( (disappointed >.<)
u were also conclusive of XX haters as mindless bla bla (dun use so many adjatives can or not?), dun tt make u a close minded one? nv think what resulted in those comments? (mind-fucked?? lolx)
anyway, if i'm to continue, i can write thesis liao.
after this essay, u can choose to choose to change ur opionion on papergoat, or go read my coursework den decide. if u chose neither, ain't u just as close-minded as ur bestie??? muahahahahahaha~~~~
btw, papergoat was DRIVING when replying u the first msg. for goodness sake. so harse on driver. 0.0
Thanks for sharing!!!:) It’s gonna be a long long reply~~~ happy reading!
ReplyDeleteFirstly, just curious, y were u reading her blog before even i ask of u to do so? U did tt as a regular thing?
Secondly, how would I know u have read a bit to have commented as "popular within PAP community"? Such responses do not need to have read it, isn’t it? I just ask u to read and an individual doesn’t need to know what it is about, to say “don’t want”. This is a norm~~~~~~ like u say – opinion-based.
Thirdly, my understandings to knowing if u had read a little beforehand do not change my sms to u tt day, cos’ it doesn’t matter as I was askin of u to not be like them... tt’s all. But it pisses me tt u don’t even wanna know what i meant.
However, it’s really good to have u share with me of what u written here. I mean I think tt’s friends r for, esp. friends who sincerely care & want the other party to understand something. Even at times of differing opinions which we have tt in common a lot~ LOL! And don’t worry, I didn’t tot ur wordings as arguments, i tot of them as opinions from u. :D
Indeed, one shld have stand but a stand cld be change after many episodes in life if they kept others’ opinions and facts in mind. And I wouldn’t think that these changes of stand are called as ‘undecisive’, as I think ‘undecisive’ is only when a person kept sitting on a ledge, like u have said. So yeah~ 2 different meanings to it if u get what I meant...
But yes, of course it’s not gd to be undecisive(which i think i get what u meant “by sitting on a bomb”, like it’s not good to not decide smth as time runs and may end up getting hurt - I guess.)
However, life isn’t always smooth - at certain times(like for me it’s now of my life) ppl wld be undecisive~ Just tt it will be better to get out of it asap to have a stand(no matter it was the “right” choice or not).
And I know opinions r really hard to change, but I hate the fact of it(and i guess my own blog wld be somewhere tt i can rant)! Tt’s y i wld think tt why r some ppl so stubborn in their way, or if put it as nicer wordings wld be “they’re so firm about it”.... ... I couldn’t do much except talk it out to the individual which may or may not work still, tt’s y i resort to lamenting about the issues here. :P
In regards to ur 2nd part of comments:
ReplyDelete1) Of course blogs contains bias contents, it has always been the case. Like how her blog was to defend herself, but still it’s an opinion to be considered ah~ and tks for reading mine for all these time, which i’m assuming tt u care, yes? Hee!
2) Though i know tt those comments r the negative effects of her support to the political parties, I still feel tt those ppl shld not do that. One issue to one issue. This time she did nothing loh~ But well, like u said – opinions r difficult to change - and such opinions wld lead to behaviour of those... But still, buay song u understand, about y r ppl so messed up in their actions.
3& 4) I agree SPH are selective, bias i think half half. Towards political I think incorrect but towards issues like economy, social issues, I think they did the right thing(eg.too many suicides not reported since somehow there shows a link to have viral effects), so I guess i still like it tt s’pore news r selective. Though I know more and more EDUCATED ppl in s’pore thinks it shld not be this way. Wanna know more, read more news from other places loh, like “all hail nageb” says~ lol. :D
5) In fact I don’t agree about your “therefore at the point of time, anti-PAP = WP supporters”. I think of it rather as to extreme low EQ ppl, like really~ wasn’t associating it with politics. It’s u who think so much into politics bah~~~~ :P
Agree to the “turn bias towards foreigners also, to check it out soon”.. hahas!
And no!!! It wasn’t becos i was closed minded to read ur coursework, but rather i’m really tired to do so. These 3 days back, had been like racing for time literately. But k lah, will go read when i got time and feel to do so k? I’m doing it not becos to show tt i’m not close minded, but rather becos u kept asking me to read so as a fren, i wld like to see what u have done urself a great job for studies. (to add on to this statement, this is what i meant earlier when “a stand cld have change” but this is not “undecisive”, hope this helps to make it clearer.)
Yes, I am being very very very conclusive of those XX haters~~~ well, it’s my blog here right? I think i can do so then. As for what results after tt, this is where i stand on my view to be conclusive of them. Well, maybe I’ll change my view if i get to know tt one of the haters r actually abused physically previously by XX, unlikely though? By then maybe I’ll change my view but well~ not anytime soon as i guess
And if by any chance u were referring to the results tt someone may use my wordings to slam me, making it viral or smth, i guess not since i am not and not intending to be one super famous person, so possibility of that super low. But well, I get what u meant by keeping my ‘mouth’ shut on online portals, i understand the negative effects of those. But who cares~ anyway, those r like my already sensored wordings~ (on a side note, sometimes i wonder if my wordings r really tt fuckup on a human level or is it me to u? Cos’ i really think some, like in this case, r fine but u find them rather harsh. Well, I’ll still learn and try to sound nicer in whatever circumstances yeah?)
Choosing to change opinion on papergoat? Well a little~ Afterall, it’s difficult to change opinion right, hee! But reading ur essay – i wld need loads of time! Hahas!
And shit u! Reply my msg when driving?! Don’t be another irresponsible one! And i don’t think u’ll only get that level of harshness if i knew u were driving. (Oops, I forgotten to say it nicely again~ :P)